It’s actually happening, and not to discredit the fine contributions and outstanding achievements of one Scott Podsednik, but it seems a good a time as any to ask:

Is this real?

Pods?

Seriously?

And he’s in center?

Wow. Well, at least the leadoff hitter problem is solved.

He’s not?

Oh. So why is he of all people patrolling center this weekend? Where’s Brian Anderson?

Tough break. What about Dewayne Wise?

Ah that’s right. Thought it’d be sooner. Not even Jerry O?

Ha! About time! So wait, the Chicago White Sox have actually burned through three centerfielders in four weeks?

You’re right, “burned through” is an exaggeration, but seriously, how did this happen?

Right, must be murder on the shoulders watching all those doubles fly over your head and bounce off the wall. Well, at least Pods has been keeping up his mischievous ways since leaving town. His basesteal–

Twelve? That’s it?

Still, that would’ve been third-most on last year’s Sox team. And he swiped them in 93 games. Took one against the Sox, even.

I know, I think my ten-year-old cousin swiped two of three off him last year as well. So what, is he back to his attempted power-hitting ways a la 2004?

So what you’re telling me is that he’s only playing center on a technicality and basically batting tenth?

Well, it’ll still be kind of cool to have him back. If you’re going to talk a mean game about playing well-rounded ball you might as well at least look the part, even if that’s not really how it’s going to happen. And hey, you know, the Cubs put Luis Vizcaino up for grabs, and the Mets just released Freddy Garcia, and Neal the Meal looks pretty ripe for the trading-for, and you know what a team with those guys on board looks like?

You’re darn right it does. Twenty-oh-nine is the new twenty-oh-five. Team of Destiny. Believe.